Screw Everyone is comedian Ophira Eisenberg’s wisecracking account of how she spent most of her life saying “yes” to everything—and everyone—and how that attitude ultimately helped her overcome her phobia of commitment. Skeptical about long-term relationships, Eisenberg approached dating as a sort of research experiment from early on: she spent her twenties traveling from futon to futon and gathering data, figuring that one day she’d put it all together somehow and build her own perfect Frankenmate. When she met a guy who didn’t fall for the emotionally cavalier facade she’d constructed (a guy who wanted marriage and monogamy), she knew it was time to reevaluate. From her first kiss to saying “I do,” Screw Everyone is an honest, hilarious chronicle of how one woman discovered herself, conquered her fears, and even found the “real thing”—one promiscuous encounter at a time.

"For one 1970's family, the center may not hold, but it certainly does fold. In 1978 Jimmy Carter mediates the Camp David Accords, Fleetwood Mac tops charts with Rumours, Starsky fights crime with Hutch, and twelve-year-old Lou Cove is uprooted from the Upper West Side of Manhattan to Salem, Massachusetts- a backwater town of witches, Puritans, and sea-captain wannabes. After his eighth move in a dozen years, Lou figures he should just resign himself to a teenage purgatory of tedious paper routes, school bullies, and unrequited lust for every girl he likes. Then one October morning an old friend of Lou's father, free-wheeling (and free-loving) Howie Gordon arrives at the Cove doorstep from California with his beautiful wife Carly. Howie is everything Lou wants to be: handsome as a movie star, built like a god and in possession of an unstoppable confidence. Then, over Thanksgiving dinner, Howie drops a bombshell. Holding up an issue of Playgirl Magazine, he flips to the center and there he is, Mr. November in all his natural glory. Howie has his eye on becoming the next Burt Reynolds, and a wild idea for how to do it: win Playgirl's Man of the Year. And he knows just who should manage his campaign. As Lou and Howie canvas Salem for every vote in town - little old ladies at bridge club, the local town witch, construction workers on break and everyone in between - Lou is forced to juggle the perils of adolescence with the pursuit of Hollywood stardom. Man of the Year is the improbable true story of Lou's thirteenth year, one very unusual campaign, and the unexpected guest who changes everything"--