"This book will challenge you to rethink your vision of a good life. With sharp insights and lucid prose, Paul Bloom makes a captivating case that pain and suffering are essential to happiness. It's an exhilarating antidote to toxic positivity." --Adam Grant, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Think Again and host of the TED podcast WorkLife One of Behavioral Scientist's "Notable Books of 2021" From the author of Against Empathy, a different kind of happiness book, one that shows us how suffering is an essential source of both pleasure and meaning in our lives Why do we so often seek out physical pain and emotional turmoil? We go to movies that make us cry, or scream, or gag. We poke at sores, eat spicy foods, immerse ourselves in hot baths, run marathons. Some of us even seek out pain and humiliation in sexual role-play. Where do these seemingly perverse appetites come from? Drawing on groundbreaking findings from psychology and brain science, The Sweet Spot shows how the right kind of suffering sets the stage for enhanced pleasure. Pain can distract us from our anxieties and help us transcend the self. Choosing to suffer can serve social goals; it can display how tough we are or, conversely, can function as a cry for help. Feelings of fear and sadness are part of the pleasure of immersing ourselves in play and fantasy and can provide certain moral satisfactions. And effort, struggle, and difficulty can, in the right contexts, lead to the joys of mastery and flow. But suffering plays a deeper role as well. We are not natural hedonists--a good life involves more than pleasure. People seek lives of meaning and significance; we aspire to rich relationships and satisfying pursuits, and this requires some amount of struggle, anxiety, and loss. Brilliantly argued, witty, and humane, Paul Bloom shows how a life without chosen suffering would be empty--and worse than that, boring.

Free yourself from destructive behavior and learn how to break your patterns of self-hate and achieve personal fulfillment with this sympathetic and practical guide from the author of The Angry Book . Many of us know that self-destructive patterns are rooted in self-dislike, but few of us understand how to break them. In this wise and compassionate book, bestselling author and eminent psychiatrist Theodore Rubin shows us realistic ways to break these negative mental and emotional attitudes and build a strong sense of well-being and self-understanding. Dr. Rubin looks of how self-hate begins, is sustained, and eventually leads to destructive and defeating behavior—from alcoholism and drug dependency to perfectionism and fear of failure (or success). Offering practical and reassuring advice, he shows that the key to freeing yourself from these restricting emotions and habits is to find and examine the self-hate that generates them, and then to release your innate and powerful capacity for compassion. This warm, sympathetic, and ultimately practical guide to personal growth and fulfillment is timelier and more helpful than ever.

Would the small gay boy you once were look up to the gay man you've become?This is the question Dr. Joe Kort explores in 10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do to Improve Their Lives (completely revised and updated edition) as he guides readers through the complex journey of becoming a fully self-actualized gay man. Learn the five biggest mistakes gay men make when seeking a relationship. Understand how to deal with loved ones who disapprove of your being gay. Overcome damaging patterns that are holding you back from enjoying a healthy sex life. Learn how to identify your own internalized homophobia, a chronic issue that prevents many gay men from leading satisfying lives and keeps them from having healthy relationships.This updated and revised edition is more sex positive than the first edition and includes a new chapter on exploring erotic turn ons and sexual interests. Out-of-Control Sexual Behavior (OCSB) is also addressed for those struggling with sexual issues.After coming out, a gay man will typically feel better at first, but often the good feelings don't last. This is because "coming out" is only part of the beginning of the journey. This book provides a map for navigating the whole long passage of becoming the gay man you want to be.

We are honored to present this timeless collection, African Proverbs by Charlotte Leslau-an extraordinary work that preserves and uplifts the enduring brilliance of African oral tradition. These proverbs are more than words; they are echoes of Ancestors, distilled wisdom, and cultural affirmations carried through generations. In a world often quick to overlook or erase African contributions, this book stands as a powerful reminder of the intellect, wit, and deep philosophy embedded in everyday African speech. These proverbs offer guidance, laughter, clarity, and community-if only we stop and listen. STILL. WE. RISE. Through rhythm, metaphor, and truth-telling, the voices of the past reach out to shape the present. Let this work remind us that our stories, our languages, and our lessons are sacred. We are committed to sharing with all who are ready to receive them.