Laugh till you cry in this new collection of stories from the award-winning "Serena Williams of humor writing" ( New York Times Book Review ) about raising babies and trying not to be one. Called a "comedic Godsend" by Conan O'Brien and "the Stephen King of comedy writing" by John Mulaney, Simon Rich is back with New Teeth, his funniest and most personal collection yet. Two murderous pirates find a child stowaway on board and attempt to balance pillaging with co-parenting. A woman raised by wolves prepares for her parents' annual Thanksgiving visit. An aging mutant superhero is forced to learn humility when the mayor kicks him upstairs to a desk job. And in the hard-boiled caper "The Big Nap," a weary two-year-old detective struggles to make sense of "a world gone mad." Equal parts silly and sincere, New Teeth is an ode to growing up, growing older, and what it means to make a family.

This is the first in a series of books compiling my short stories I've written over the past twelve or more years. I am a book ghost writer and editor of long standing, and these stories reflect a variety of different genres, including fiction and nonfiction, where I wrote either for practice or in order to improve my writing. Original, suspenseful tales; gripping, humorous, including horror, science fiction, narrative nonfiction, and a host of other topics as perceptively descriptive stories, which should help you perceive the Universe in a whole new intrinsically original and realistic light.